NEW BLOG at www.augustagail.com

Hi everyone!  I've officially updated and refurbished my blog - you can check it out and follow along with my adventures and writing at www.augustagail.com  Thank you so much for all the love and support - y'all are the best! :)

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Stay Posted

Hi everyone!

Sorry for the lack of posts lately - I'm in the middle of revamping/redoing my blog!  The new one should be up soon, so stay posted!!  It's going to be fabulous!!

XOXO!

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Stress Happens

Okay, so I’m usually pretty decent at handling stress. In fact, I like to think that, to some degree, I thrive on it.

Today, that is not the case.

Usually, Mondays don’t bother me. I don’t dread the weekend ending (though of course I wish it could go on forever, but I really do enjoy working).

Today, Monday is bothering me.

Well, not Monday itself per say, just the crazy amounts of stuff that I suddenly have going on.

Amidst having my car totaled, juggling three jobs, dealing with some weird medical issues, traveling and running errands, I’ve finally lost my composure. This morning I want to lay on the floor and cry like a toddler.

Of course, my officemates might not enjoy that, so I think I’ll save it for when I get home tonight.

I’m only half kidding.

Seriously, today’s been nutty.

But, I know I’m capable of handling everything. Sometimes life gets messy and chaotic, and dealing with that is what makes us stronger and more capable.

I’m going to have to make some decisions regarding my schedule, and I’m going to have to start figuring out where I want my priorities to be. I’m so blessed to have several amazing jobs – I really do love all of them. It’s just a matter of balancing them better, which is something I’m still learning how to do.

Hell, I’m only 24, and up till now I’ve worked as a bartender (that’s a whole different kind of multitasking). It’s exciting to finally have to balance and juggle big girl jobs, even if it does make me want to scream sometimes. I do wish I had a mini-bar in my office right now though…I’d whip up a Jameson and Cranberry right about now.

I really do love writing, even jotting all this down is making me feel monumentally better. (That being said, if anyone in the LA area wants to bring me a drink, feel free).

Another reaffirming thing is the love and support I’ve received from people recently – everyone from friends, to people I work with, to family. In the midst of the madness, they know how to make me focus on what’s important and how to remind me that, at the end of the day, I am loved – and no amount of stress can take that away.

So here's to all the wonderful people in my life - cheers!

XOXO!

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Sunday Shopping

Since November 1st (AKA three days ago), I've indulged in a gingerbread latte and a peppermint mocha latte (the holidays are my favorite time for Starbucks). And I can assure everyone that I will be partaking in these wintery delights many more times before January rolls around.

Just wanted to share my coffee addiction.

Anyhow, today's Sunday which means football, chips and salsa, and lazy lounging. Plus, daylight savings happened last night which meant we got an extra hour of sleep! Today was the first time I've been able to sleep late in what feels like weeks. And I made the most of it. This upcoming work week is going to be nutty so I feel like I might as well enjoy some downtime while I've got it.

Also, GO COWBOYS - we won today which was a lovely surprise.

While we did end up doing some relaxing today, Linus and I ended up going out and running some errands which ended up being productive for my happiness/problematic for my wallet.

I found some awesome deals at TJ MAXX and ended up with the following:

This AMAZING lotion made from hemp seed. I think this might smell better than any other lotion/soap/anything I've ever come across. It literally smells like freshly baking lemon squares. I'm obsessed.

A new fancy purse that was over 50% of the original price. It's a medium sized saddle bag style purse with fun stitching and details. Love it!

Now we're back home, about to cook some tacos and take it easy!

Hope everyone had a great weekend!

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Unicorns, Sushi and Good Times

It's November! Crazy right?

I can't believe how fast the past 6 months have gone by - and how much wonderful change has taken place.

First things first, I just want to say thank you for the outpouring of love and positivity I received in regards to my post yesterday. I was so overwhelmed with happiness that I think I even cried a little bit.

And, I'm happy to say, Halloween was a success - on a number of fronts!

I decided (very last minute!) to dress up as a Rainbow Sparkle Unicorn. The best part? I didn't have to buy anything. Haha what does that tell you about my style?

I think the costume ended up being pretty cute :) This is the first time in I don't know how many years that I wore this much clothes for Halloween, and, quite frankly, I felt awesome. I could actually focus on having fun with my boyfriend and puppy, instead of worrying about how many people were looking at me, or if I was "sexy" enough. I didn't give a f**k. I ran around like a happy, rainbow, sparkle unicorn and felt confident and very much like myself. 

Vince Neil Armstrong + Rainbow Unicorn + NFL Puppy = LOVE!

Meep!

To celebrate the night, Linus and I went out for a deeeelicious sushi dinner (we are obsessed with saki).

SUPER California Roll!

Then we adventured out to the Santa Monica carnival/street party thing. It was crazy. Thousands of people wandering along the boulevard being extremely drunk and mostly naked. People watching was AWESOME. Being bumped by peoples fake weapons and strange headpieces was slightly less enjoyable. But it was definitely fun to experience the whole thing.

After braving Santa Monica, we headed over to The Dark Room (great bar) and grabbed a drink before heading home to eat cereal. It was midnight and we were exhausted. Yeah, we're hardcore.

It was a fabulous Halloween, the perfect amount of low-key and craziness. Plus I got to wear a bunch of rainbows, which is one of my favorite things to do. Again, I'm really hardcore (obviously).

Hope everyone had a great Halloween and that y'all weren't any of the 73 people arrested in LA last night. 

XOXO!

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Happy Halloween - A Conversation Starter

Happy Halloween y'all!

What's everyone doing to celebrate?

My Halloween plans:

*work

*7 mile run this evening

*hit up Santa Monica Blvd to enjoy some quality people watching

*eat candy periodically throughout the day

What's crazy though is that I still don't have a costume!

I always have a costume. 

Here's a list of some of my previous ensembles:

When I was teeny tiny I dressed up as a black cat, a kitty princess, Minnie mMouse, a dalmatian, an alien, a '50s chick, and Pippi Longstockings. Unfortunately, all these photos are at my parents house so I can't provide any evidence.

In high school I was Bam Bam one year (my BFF was a sumo wrestler - basically the best thing ever - her costume kept deflating), a devil, and I think I was a cat again? 

This isn't from Halloween, but it's pretty damn awesome if I do say so myself.

The aforementioned costumes are from a simpler, more innocent time. As I got older...well, don't judge me. I'll give you my full opinion after you see the photos.

My first year of college, my girlfriends and I went as neon tigers:

Then I went as a bunny...

I was Janet from Rocky Horror one year (I'm not posting any of those photos because, well, I was only wearing underwear).

Last Halloween I was Emma Frost from X-Men.

Notice a trend?

Yes, I'm one of the many young women that has bought into the overtly sexy Halloween costume trend. Granted, these photos aren't as provocative as they could be, but they're certainly not trying to be creative or clever...

Wearing these costumes, I always knew there was something that made me feel not-quite-right about it, but I'd tell myself, "It's Halloween! Embrace your sexuality! Just do it! Boobs! Butt! Sexy!"

And trust me, I'm all for embracing your sexuality. I adore my sexy side and I love to flaunt it (sometimes maybe a little too much). It's so important to understand and be proud of that side of ourselves. But I've begun to realize that these sort of costumes - and at times, the clothes I wear on a daily basis - aren't sending the right message (to others and to myself).

I hate to admit it, but appearing sexy and desirable has played a huge role in my life. For too many years, I've placed my self-worth on my appearance and on whether or not men found me attractive. Obviously, Halloween isn't the root cause of this, but it's a great diving board for broaching the subject. 

After all, I didn't dress up as a sexy leopard or hotttt bunny for my own benefit - I dressed that way to get attention. I didn't wear lingerie as Janet because it made me feel empowered as a woman - it made me feel like the male species would find me f-able.

Yuck. Just writing that gives me the ooky shivers.

But I want to be honest about it, because I think it's something almost all women deal with. We're constantly reminded of the appearance-driven molds we're meant to fit into - skinny, tan, perfectly proportioned, blah blah blah. None of this is anything new - we've been receiving and trying to deal with these stereotypes for years. And we buy into it - at least I did (and still do).

Somehow, somewhere along the way, I associated my value with how I looked. Not the fact that I'm funny, a writer, or a great runner. Not the fact that I'm outgoing, loving, and unique.

I convinced myself that the only things that mattered were how flat my stomach appeared, how good my clothes made my butt look, and how other people perceived me physically.

So, dressing up skanky for Halloween was a no-brainer.

I remember my mum would give me costume ideas that were actually clever and still cute. I routinely ignored her suggestions and donned as little clothing as possible.

But in the past half-year or so, I've begun to reevaluate my priorities. I've begun to understand that my negative obsession with sexuality - and my unhealthy relationship with my appearance - have deeply affected my life - and gotten me into some seriously dangerous situations.

I've begun to explore why I feel the way I do in relation to these issues, and the results have been life-changing. It hasn't been easy, but I finally feel like I'm shedding my insecurities and accepting (happily) that there's more to me than my sexuality.

I've had amazing support from my boyfriend, friends and family throughout this journey, and I plan on continuing to write about it.

I do think that the reason I've had such difficulty coming up with a costume this year is that I'm scared. The idea of dressing up as a sexy anything gives me very conflicted emotions. There's a part of me that wants to wear sweatpants and a tee-shirt or something totally ridiculous. Then there's that part of me that insists I put on a black corset, heels, and a pair of animal ears - just one last time. I think I need to find the happy medium - something that makes me feel good about myself, but in a healthy way.

So that's my goal for tonight - I'll let you know what happens!

Have a wonderful, safe Halloween and, no matter your costume, make sure it makes YOU feel confident. 

Thanks for reading, I honestly didn't begin this post today with the intention of writing all this. It just sort of happened. But I'm so thankful for everyone who stops by and reads about my crazy life :)

XOXO!

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Back in CA!

Woohoo back from Florida!

It was fun visiting the other coast, but I am definitely happy to be back in CA. It's a really cool feeling - California already feels so much like home.

But we had a good time, minus the fact that I turned into a total space cadet (I blame it on the humidity) and lost my favorite gray Madewell tanktop (left it in the hotel) and my driver's license on the SECOND NIGHT OF THE TRIP (pretty sure it went down a toilet...long story).

Thankfully I must have looked old or something, because I didn't get carded once. The only real issue was getting back on the plane. Thankfully, the American Airlines employees we're super sweet and cut me some major slack (read: no questioning, weird probing, etc.). I needed to get a CA license anyway, so maybe this is the universe's way of being like, "You are meant to be in California!"

I did run into a problem when I tried to buy cold medicine at the grocery store the other day. I forgot how many things you have to have your ID for!

Anyhow! Back to the trip:

Nerfherder show at Nerdapalooza in Orlando!

The ocean!

Awww :)

Thugs.

We were doing the YMCA...this is the A.

We ate dinner at this delicious seafood restaurant where I indulged in: wine, salmon, veggies, rice, an Irish coffee, and this amazing mango cheesecake/guava mousse dessert. 

I didn't have a lot of chances to access wi-fi so you'll have to forgive me for the lack of posts over the past couple of days. But I'm back and ready to do some serious blogging!

XOXO!

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